Beyond my AppleScript skills,*** but I'm wondering if Keyboard Maestro could have a macro using the standard Command-Shift-D shortcut for sending a message that instead Executes an AppleScript which
- targets the frontmost Mail window (the message);
- activates a specified delay; then
- sends the message after the delay, or
- displays a prompt to confirm sending immediately or canceling the macro.
If #3, that would certainly necessitate the user also having a macro to cancel all running macros.
***You, ccstone, are astoundingly better with AppleScript than I am, but this is not to suggest you develop such a script, rather more of a strategy being thrown out for consideration as to how this task might be accomplished.